And that is what it is, nonsense. If you are to be really anal about the whole thing it is illegal nonsense. The Cyclonazis are nuts. They want to cycle over the bridge because it is there. Their claims that there is a great demand for such a practice is just crap.
A few years back there was a shuttle bus across the Auckland Harbour Bridge that, I think, had a trailer attached in which to place your velocipede for the trip over the briny. You cycled up to the bus place, paid a nominal charge, put your bike in the trailer, hopped on the nice comfy bus, got transported over the bridge, collected your steed from the trailer and pedaled off into the sunset. Luverly. Well luverly if that's what you are into. I personally think bicycles make good television for three weeks in July if they are all in France but otherwise are as much use as a chocolate wristwatch. Why the hell did man invent the internal combustion engine for Pete's sake. Anyway some enterprising sort ran this service for the nutters who wanted to take their pushbikes from Herne Bay to Birkenhead or whatever. This service no longer exists. Why, you may ask? Because there was no demand for it, that's why. All these people who want to commute to Auckland's CBD from the North Shore don't bloody well exist.
So these Cyclists want to cycle over the bridge for recreation only. 'We have rights' they bleat. Bollocks you do when you want to cycle up the motorway. For that's what the bridge is. It is a section of motorway; no more and no less. You don't get 'Right's Groups' hankering after pedaling from Greenlane to Penrose, do you? They have as much 'right' to cycle over the bridge as a bloke in a microlight has to fly from Auckland Airport without Air Traffic Control clearance and land in Victoria Park. You just don't do it.
OK, it's unnecessary, illegal, and it is also bloody dangerous. I don't much care about it being dangerous to cyclists but it is. It gets jolly windy up on the bridge. I have felt the buffeting in a couple of tons of aerodynamic Jaguar on occasion and I shudder to think what it would be like on a push bike. The last thing we need is having to avoid cyclists being blown all over the show in the already parlously narrow bridge lanes. If I don't care about it being dangerous to cyclists I do care about it being dangerous to me. I care even more about it being dangerous to my vastly overpowered supercharged motorized transport. I mean, what if they scratch the paint?
Unnecessary, illegal, dangerous - not looking too flash thus far, is it? How about we add in a touch of expensive; no make that bloody expensive. $42 mil to add a cycle lane. And who is going to pay for this? The lycra clad Sunday jauntists? The one weird beard commuting to his job in the Public Library in the City. No, it will be funded from the tax payer's dollar. No it bloody well won't.
This sort of crap has to be stopped. Vocal minority groups are given far too much leeway in the Land of the Long White Equal Rights. Next time a bunch of nutters demands to be allowed to hot air balloon over the city to save the whale they should be a) told to piss off and then b) be locked up for a while. How big a while? Who cares? Leave the world to real people who want to get on with life in a sensible twenty first century way. And for openers leave the motorways to motors - preferably bloody big ones.
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