Zaoui - over at last

I had heard rumour that there was a picture about that proved our state secrets are not as safe as the headmistress would have us believe. But maybe that was all it was - a rumour.

Such is the world of the spooks; rumours, counter rumours, half truths and meeting under the clock at Victoria station with a carnation in your buttonhole and a rolled up copy of the Times under your left arm. NZ's chief spook was on public view giving Ahmed Zaoiuiioiaai a day to remember. Next to him with an elfin grin as wide as a mile was the only lawyer in the world who goes to court in the morning and does play-doh in the afternoon. If Deborah Manning is a day over twelve I'm a Frenchman. Qui est un gagneur? Sorry. Who's a winner in all this sorry mess which has been ended with wall to wall compromise?

1) Zauiioeiuaii - obviously.

2) Room 2 at Manning's kindie - equally obviously.

3) The government - definitely. Labour wanted this affair dragging on like a hole in the head. The last thing they wanted was to have to deport this bloke in an election year. Imagine the publicity Comrade Keith and his lot would have drummed up if the goons had to go and drag Ahmed to the airport. There would be human shields, people chaining themselves to railway tracks, singing of 'We shall not be moved' and 'Cumbaya', bad beards and body odour all over the show. Messy, messy, messy and not allowable. The conclusion that this decision from the SIS didn't really come from left field but was suggested by a political master is very hard to avoid. Just remind me who is the Minister for the SIS.

4) Every other Zaioiuaiauui look alike who is wondering on which flight he should tear up his passport. Yup. If the idea behind all this nonsense from the SIS was to persuade the world's ne'er do wells that the People's Republic of Aoteoroa was not a soft touch the outcome has done just the opposite. Stick it out and you are home free. It won't even cost you any money. The stupid taxpayers of New Zealand will fork out $3 mil to ensure you get what you want. Daft. If AZ was a risk when he arrived (and apparently he was) the passage of time bolstered by a soft immigration policy that insists on fairness (bad stuff) and endless appeals (even worse stuff) has led us to yesterday. What is wrong with an immigration policy that goes something like this? 'You have flushed your passport down the aircraft dunny so you will go back from whence you came' 'But I don't want to and I am in danger if I return to Luton' 'Tough - sod off. Gate 13 is first on the left'. Works for me.

5) The tax payer - no way Jose. In addition to the $3 mil, we are presumably in the gun for shedloads more to support the imminent arrival of the Zauoiuiiuoii whanou.

Still the New Zealand taxpayer is better off than McLaren. Can you imagine being fined US$100,000,000? They are presumably only being stung for that amount in the belief that they can pay it. Different world from the one I move in.

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